During the initial part of the relationship while you are still flirting with the girl, it’s important to start touching. Not only does it help you feel good, but if done right it can arouse a lot of attraction in her to the extent of charging her with sexual desire. But it’s also important to understand that going overboard with touching during this phase of the relationship can be detrimental. Remember the thumb rule “less is more”. Be subtle and be patient; there are rich dividends to be reaped later.
Now is the time for the “passing touch”. Girls are intensely aware of the skin to skin feel and they love to be touched. Guys on the other hand love touching. It’s usual for guys to feel attracted to the soft areas on the girl’s body (there are plenty of that, not just the two areas you are thinking about). Whenever a guy sees a pretty girl it’s common for him to imagine her naked; most of the time he would think about how it would feel to touch her, especially her breasts and butt. This initiates a craving inside for him to have sex with that girl. This entire act of imagination is so unconscious that many guys, who are not very comfortable with their sexuality, actually feel embarrassed about thinking that way.
You need to remember that your mind is wired for sex; it is a very biological thing and hence is unconsciously triggered. It’s natural and of-course and its fun. But you also need to realize that this need or craving can interfere and lead to disastrous consequences if you lose self control; you risk coming across as a needy weirdo. Girls love sex as much as guys do, even more, but the approach has to be right, else it spoils everything.
The Passing Touch
During the initial part of the flirting process, even as soon as the second time you meet up, you can start with the process of touching very subtlety. The passing touch references to touching her almost imperceptibly, a touch which lasts only for a second. She will feel it, either consciously or unconsciously, so don’t worry it will have its effect.
The best areas to touch initially would be her hands and shoulders. Girls take a lot of care to ensure that their hands look good, have you noticed? There is a lot of pain endured in waxing their hands and arms to keep them looking sexy.
As mentioned earlier, initially you should touch her without conscious intention; you need to act as if you did not touch her consciously. For example, when you are standing and talking with her, just touch her upper arm slightly as if you are trying to look beyond her on the floor. When she looks back just say something like “i think I saw a rat pass by or something”, that will have her squealing and coming close to you. I am sure you can come up with a lot of similar excuses to touch her. Just ensure that the touch does not last for more than a second. Touching her skin is more effective than touching her clothes of course.
Tips for Touching, for the Newbie
If you are new to the game it’s natural to feel very conscious while touching the girl. She might even sense that and feel a “weirdo” alarm going up in her head. It’s important to do this in a subtle manner. Unconscious touching is always okay, remember that. So get started with pulling off “unconscious touching” while being very conscious. I will tell you how.
Don’t be intimated at the prospect of touching her, no matter how much in awe you are of her. That’s a mistake to start with though; don’t be in awe of her, just think of her as another girl. Know that there are plenty to choose from if this does not work out. Keep it cool and keep it relaxed. Be subtle and everything will look natural. Here are a few touching tips, all these touches should be a “passing touch” (not more than a second).
- Touch her shoulder from behind whenever you approach her.
- Touch her clothing while remarking on how nice the fabric feels, say something like “nice dress” and touch it. The upper arm would be the best place for this act.
- Ask her for a high five in a casual manner. This works wonders, because now she will have to touch you consciously. It should be a bland “give me five”, no flowery expressions allowed on your part else you might end up in the “friends zone” with her.
- If you have big hands you can try this ruse. Tell her how small her hands look, ask her to place it on your hand to compare the sizes. Say something like “you got small hands, just see how small they are keep it on my hand”. Any girl would follow up on it. Once she places her hand on yours, just laugh and leave it at that. Don’t prolong the touch for more than two seconds. If done right this is highly sexual.
- While crossing the road or in a crowded mall, you can extend your arm for her to hold. It should look like a very unconscious gesture on your part, it should show that as a guy you are worried about her safety. If she holds your arm or hand, well you have it made. If she doesn’t there is no sweat because you can always pretend that it was unconscious on your part and go about it casually. Don’t ever look sheepish if your attempt fails, always keep a straight face as if you are not aware of what happened. You get the lay of it right?
- You can even dare to touch her waist, the area slightly above her butt, on the pretext of guiding her through a crowded mall or a pub. It works as long as you do it very subtly. She can feel it of-course, don’t apply any pressure, just a feather touch.
- The whisper technique is much abused, but it looks better on girls than on guys. So if you want you can try it but be cautious, it might get you in an awkward position if done wrong. The best tip while doing this is to avoid getting too close to her ear, just lean towards her shoulder and whisper something pretty bland like “this class sucks”.
- The reading her palm technique is very common and known to most girls. Almost every guy on the block has tried it. So if you want to stand apart don’t try it. Of course it’s your wish, if you are genuinely good at reading palms you can give it a try. Don’t blame me if she gives you a wry “yeah I know this trick” look.
Given a situation just use your ingenuity to come up with excuses to touch her. While touching, less is more remember that though. Each touch has the capacity to arose attraction in her, mostly physical attraction. You can even sense the sexual tension in her eyes at times, when you get it just right. Just make sure the touching feels as if it was unconscious on your part, this will have her more attracted.
She will Get Close
If you are playing your cards right, she will feel sexually attracted to you. All girls have the tendency to lean towards guys they find attractive. On some pretext or the other she will try to come close to you, may be with an excuse of showing you something or telling you something secretive. She might even whisper in your ears especially with that soft sensual voice. When she does all this make sure you keep a straight face and look disinterested for the most part. Any excitement on your part can be a turn off.
Remember the golden rule “Girls love guys who seem to care for nothing”, one of the ultimate secrets of the seduction gurus. Be relaxed and don’t get carried away, one mistake can reduce attraction and you don’t want that to happen. Each bit of attraction built leads to a high sexual charge inside her to the point where she is craving for your physical closeness.
If you see her touching you a lot for one reason or the other then you know that she is feeling the heat.
Taking it to the Next Level
Remember that less is more initially. Don’t keep touching her every now and then, this reduces the intensity of each touch. Keep it less and far in between. Once she feels attracted she will start doing her bit of the touching, so relax. Let her touch you, but don’t follow it up by touching her. Keep it real and don’t ever get excited while touching.
If you work it right it wont be long before you will get signs of her closeness. She will let you know that you have the permission to touch on the other areas of her body, obviously she won’t spell it out to you. Just sense the subtle signals, sometimes they wont even be subtle, she will try to lean across to you, she will find every reason to whisper something, she will find a reason to touch your hand, pat your shoulder, give you a childish tap on your cheek, get close to you while sitting or standing. When she starts doing all this you are ready to start the second level, touching the more intimate areas (I am not talking about breasts and butt here, its too early for that).
- Touch her hair and feel its texture, tell her that it feels like silk or something. Less is more, don’t go overboard with flowery compliments, keep it bland. Something like “your hair feels soft to touch” or “your hair is silky” is cool enough.
- Touch her cheek on the pretext of removing a speck of something. The girl wouldn’t care if there was a speck in the first place, as long as you do it right (do it almost unconsciously without being too involved). She will feel great.
- Touch her waist more, on the pretext of guiding her through busy roads or malls. She wouldn’t mind you doing that now. If she looks uncomfortable with your touch get back to the start of the article, you messed up somewhere.
- Hold hands while walking through crowded places. If done right she will like you for being protective, girls love it.
- Let your hand rest on her thighs (when she is wearing something over it of course), while watching a movie or on the pretext of being tired.
Touching is the intimate exchange between a guy and a girl. It has a great capacity to generate sexual desires in the girl. Getting her charged up sexually will increase her attraction for you a hundred fold. If you are doing it right, the girl will keep wanting more. Remember the thumb rule, in your case “Less is more” so don’t get too generous with the touching. When you touch following these rules, it will be highly intense.