Deal With A Contentious Girlfriend's Criticisms

A practical scenario where Jane is nagging Jack is given below. Let's look at the wrong and the right reactions.

Wrong way:

Jane: I am just tired of your habit of sleeping around like a lazy pig. What don't work some part time jobs to make more money?

Jack: Yeah I am sorry, I just feel lazy at times. I know its not right of me.

Jane: And look at your room, it's so untidy. I want it looking neat the next time I come around.

Jack: Yeah I will take care of that

Right way:

Jane: I am just tired of your habit of sleeping around like a lazy pig. What don't work some part time jobs to make more money?

Jack: That's the way I am and I will look for a job when I need the money. What I do will always be my decision. I don't want such talk again, am I clear?

Jane: How the hell can you talk to me like that

Jack: I don't appreciate your tone either

Mind you, the right way is not always the easy way. You will have to deal with the consequences. Girls can have their way through emotional outbursts. She will try it on you. Her reaction can be one the below

1. She become cold towards you

2. She starts crying

3. She tells you she is leaving you forever

The best reaction to her emotional outburst is to be detached. If you react to it by apologizing it will reinforce his behavior on her part. Don't bother about any drama, just let it ride. It's easier said than done, but the rewards are rich. When she sees that you are in the least bothered, she will never try it again with you.

Don't intimidated by her reaction

When you put your foot down, she is bound to react. Either because she is surprised at your authority or because she wants to test you unconsciously. She would take on a hurt look, become cold or stop talking to you.

Don't be intimidated by her reactions. With time even the worst storm calms down. Its just a matter of time. Be patient; don't end up apologizing profusely as soon as she gets emotional. This will reinforce her bad behavior. Be dominant and stay strong. She will come back if she really loves you. If she doesn't come back it shows her ego is more important than her love for you, it's good riddance as far as you are concerned.

Remember the one who cares less always controls the relationship.